Death and all his friends...

Such rude shock! Seeing her personal message on blackberry messenger with the words 'R.I.P'...I enlarged the display picture and behold...it was a secondary school mate. Another UDSS '05 fallen hero.


Life as we know is vanity. We are here today, gone tomorrow like the wind. I remember reading a tweet last year which said 'when someone dies, the rest of us become sullen, then take time to reflect on our lives and then life goes on'.


I'm probably having that reflection moment. All that keeps coming to mind is; 'it could have been me'. I don't understand how someone that young should just die. All his dreams, all he has suffered and gone through just to make sense out of life. All the efforts put in to be somebody.


The thought crossed my mind - if he had known he would die this young, would there have been any need to even go to school? Wouldn't he have just stayed home and chilled or probably just do what he loves doing best? maybe singing, acting, writing or whatever his talent was.


I know how tired I was of school. Even there was a time I contemplated dropping out of the university because of all the stress but I said I just needed to be strong and do what's right and expected of me. Imagine someone going through all these struggles and sacrifice, only to be cut short in his prime. He's not even able to reap one percent of his efforts. His dreams, job desires, beautiful family he probably dreamt of having someday, kids and wife. All gone with the wind!


This could have been me and if it was me, I ask myself now, would it all have been worth it? All my extra carefulness and being so hard on myself when I derail. Trying so hard to stay focused and live right. Doing my possible best to be a better person, even sacrificing so many things just so I can get this thing we call life right.


Maybe, just maybe all these are beyond me. Maybe it's time I let go and just live. After all what would happen, would happen and when death and all his friends come calling...what more can I do?


So I tell myself, it's time to truly live and be happy. No one says you can't have it all. Career, family, friends, education, love, happiness, laughter and all the good things of life. All that's needed is a positive approach, a forgiving heart and a mind that's open to change and of cause all these living will be useless without God.


In a twisted way, I wouldn't say I am scared of dying, I just don't want to die feeling short changed. I want to die feeling I have lived my life to the fullest. That I was here, I lived, I loved, I touched someone's heart and left my mark (Beyonce - I was here).


This evening feels so dull and painful. a shining star has been quenched by death's cold hands and once again, a rare potential talent shall be swallowed by the earth...so much untapped potentials lost.


When death and his friends come calling, I want to know my life on earth was worth it all...it's time to live, enough of trying so hard to get it right...this is my life, i am done fighting with myself...I'm done being a robot...now's the time to truly live...


Ryan Calhoun lyrics :
"This is your life"

It’s coming down
The weight of the world’s coming fast
If you wait around
You’ll see that it all comes to pass
Every time
You find out the world isn’t flat
Just trace the ground
You’ll find just where you’re at

Chorus
This is your life
Don’t try to get it right
There’s nothing here to find
I wish you could see how you burn so bright
This is your life

All the roads
You’ve taken right down to the end
At every turn
You’ve found something new begins
So take the right
And travel the long where it goes
All in time
You’re wonder how far you’ve gone

Chorus
This is your life
Don’t try to get it right
There’s nothing here to find
I wish you could see how you burn so bright
This is your life

All this time spent
chasing after
things that won’t survive

Chorus
This is your life
Don’t let it pass you by
There’s nothing here to find
I wish you could see how you burn so bright

This is your life
Don’t try to get it right
You’ve climbed to such great heights
and everyone sees how you burn so bright

This is your life
This is your life
This is your life
This is your life
This is your life