Saturday, 31 December 2016


6.         BE YOUR OWN HERO 
It’s good to have someone to talk to, that listening ear to hear you out. Not necessarily for advice, rather, ‘cuz just letting it out can bring clarity. But then, don’t make the mistake of leaning so much on that person. Because -
My style when I’m feeling down or going through serious stuff is to shut the world out. I deactivate my social media accounts, go offline and just stay within my own space, pray and listen to music.

I’m lucky to have close friends I get to chat/talk stuff out with also, and it really helps but never have I really opened up to someone completely about my inner pains. Like actually voice out some stuff I have never said to anyone before or even spoken aloud. I did that this year and it was a terrible mistake.

For the first time I told someone, I broke down and the person was there (or so I thought). It felt okay, like I was safe. I thought the person got me. Then I let my guard down and just leaned completely on this person’s shoulder.

No one is Jesus Christ. Everyone has their own issues, so really it was unfair what I did pouring all my luggage. Next thing I heard from a mutual friend was that I was described as being needy. Mehn that shit hurt!

Oh well… Anyway, lesson learnt. Never again would that happen. I’ll continue to be my own hero and learn to process my stuff my own way.
It is okay to talk to someone but please give them breathing space also. They too have their own issues, even that your pastor, he was first human before he became a pastor and even after being called, he is still human and has his own issues.

Please let us learn to be our own heroes. No one really likes a needy person. The only one I know who is never tired of us pouring our frustration on him is Jesus Christ.

7.         AGE IS NOT A NUMBER 
Another December 14 has passed. I think I should give up trying to hide my birthday ‘cus no matter how hard I try to, people always remember…
For the very first time, my age actually bothered me. Normally I complain that I’m getting old and all, but it’s usually just bants.

This time it was for real. I wasn’t happy at all. Why? I didn’t feel complete. A kid was missing from the picture, but still, I know I’m not yet ready for that responsibility as there are stuff I need to put in place first.

I feel like I need more time to explore, figure things out, see the world and satisfy my curiosity before finally settling down to start a family. I don’t want to be 60years old and still doing school run, neither do I want to be 60 years old and feel like I didn’t live enough or see the world or explore/open myself to things.
At work that day (December 14th), my branch Manager came to my desk and was going on about with the birthday wishes…I started complaining and saying I wasn’t feeling excited and maybe  I shouldn’t have even come to work.

He said I should be happy that don’t I know some people that would have been celebrating their birthday same day are in the grave? Then I said, they are in a better place, after all that’s what people say when someone dies.

He was stunned. Totally speechless. He didn’t have another word for me. He gave me that look he gives each time I say something outrageous/ridiculous but I know this one topped it all. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful to be alive but then I’m stepping into this serious phase of life, one I don’t think I’m ready for.

30 years maybe this close but I think I still have time to do stuff on my bucket list and keep the memories for myself. What I need now is to just focus and work towards living the life I have always pictured.

When Ose came to my place some weeks back, he saw the glowing stars I put on my wallpaper. He was like, you have started bringing your fantasies to reality. What he said made me feel like I was on track as regards living my dreams.

I’m no more just dreaming or writing about my thoughts on how I want my life to be but this is me actually doing them for real. Yes, there are one or two major steps I’m yet to take, majorly because even the thought of it freaks me out but I know it’s time to face it. Just go for it and carry on from there…

There are some things I used to feel so strongly about or borderline sure that I wasn’t capable of doing. Things like falling in love with a married woman, or cheating, divorce, fraud, betrayal. Mostly those stuff that has to do with morality.
I was so opinionated about having to do the right thing that I most times tended to be harsh on my friends, those I felt were doing stuff that I considered morally unacceptable.

Sometimes you need to be in certain situations before you can actually appreciate what people are going through. This year I learnt that life isn’t black and white. There are no hard and fast rules.

I fell in love with someone who is married. At first I was in denial about my feelings because I felt it just couldn’t be. This was the very thing I stood against, but as the days went by, the feelings grew stronger. I got to a point where I began questioning everything I stood for. Should I indulge and lower my moral standards?       
As I have come to realize, life isn’t black and white. Having the feelings wasn’t the crime but acting on it was. So I did what I know my conscience would allow me live with…I walked away. 
I don’t judge anyone or have opinions about anything anymore. I’m just here living life with the mind-set that anyone could find themselves in whatever situation at any time. When we get to that bridge…we’ll cross it and sort it out accordingly as the situation presents itself. No hard and fast rules to life.

I was discussing with someone recently, he was giving me props for how orderly my life seemed to be. I stopped him and said not really, that I actually see it as a problem. 
I have a thing for planning everything. I want to always be in control of every detail as much as possible in order to have an easy ride through my day’s schedule (of course I always make room for mishaps as I know full well I don’t own myself or my time). But to a large extent I tend to plan everything but if it doesn’t work as planned I have learnt to accept it as it comes and make do. 
Planning too much tends to make me obsess and worry about things working out as planned. Very unhealthy and also in contrary to God’s word. I have over the years had to learn patience and also learnt to completely rely on God and know that whatever happens to me is permitted by Him and as such, no matter how rough that particular period of my life is, it would always work out for my good. Heck, most times things come out even much better than I prayed for.

Concerning work, I have since learned that it is all in His hands. The moment I let go and stopped trying to meet my targets myself, God has been blowing my mind time and again.
Towards the end of each financial year everyone tries to arrange himself. I don’t wait for December before I start sorting out my figures and that of my team members. By November I already have a picture of what our closing numbers would be give or take any major changes.
Before proceeding on vacation this November, my team’s balance sheet was a far cry from what we needed. My mind started working overtime on how to overcome the challenge. A part of me was telling me to calm down and not do anything, just abandon myself and everything to God and let Him do what he always does. But the other part of me, the one that plans everything/that loves fixing situations was pondering, trying to figure out what and what can be done. I settled for meeting my senior colleague to help out since his team was doing great. He assured me that by December he will help out. I told myself situation fixed. All was well again and then I went on leave.
During my leave my colleague called to say the person I was banking on had lost almost all his deposit. I kept repeating OMG!
Funny how I thought I had fixed my problem. 
Two weeks later my colleague called that my team just got a huge deposit which was just enough for us to close the year on a good note. When she told me, I screamed and said miracle money!!! This was God coming through for me once again.                 
After the call I got thinking, when would I learn? I’ve seen God work mysteriously as per my job several times, yet I still doubted and tried to fix it myself. I told myself that hence forth I won’t make that mistake again. Whatever comes, I‘ll just let God. Even if I lose my job, I’ll know it’s His plan for me because one thing I know for sure is He always gives me better. I’m done with the planning, obsessing and trying to control everything.
You know how it seems we’ve all got other people’s lives figured out but have no clue what next to do with ours?
Opinions…everyone has that. Society has laid out plans for you to live your life, family has certain expectations for you to meet, your friends need you to act in certain manner so as not to embarrass them, your colleagues need you to be that machine so their work load is reduced…. but hey, it’s your life and not theirs.

Don’t let nobody tell you your life is over
Be every colour that you are
Into the rush now
You don’t have to know how
Or know it al before you try…- Aly & Aj (Rush)

Everyone seems to know exactly just what decisions you should be making. How long would you have the back seat in your own life? Waiting for people to toss you around with their unsolicited advice. Don’t you think it’s time you do you and just live your life the way it pleases you? Damn society and damn everyone with their idealistic expectation of how you are supposed to live.

Its time you discovered who you truly are and just roll with that. Your happiness and sanity is in your hands. No one can drive you crazy unless you give them the keys.
Life is too short to waste it trying to please anyone or live up to some people’s standards who really don’t care about your happiness. 

Be with those who bring out the very best version of who you are, not those who try to mold you into someone you can’t even recognize in the mirror.
Well, what do I know? …I am but just a kid

Friday, 30 December 2016


2016 has indeed been a year of learning for me. This post is about the top 10 things I’m taking away from the year. Some of them I have always known but this year I think they really stuck.
There’s this popular saying - choose your battles wisely. There are struggles we can win by fighting hard and persevering but then there are some that we win by letting go.

This year was quite a tricky one. Initially it started on a shitty note, then it got worse. Suddenly it became really great. Soon enough it became sour. Happiness came around once more, disappeared and then I broke down completely. I’ve always known this – Happiness; it comes and goes. It’s a cycle.

I became scared of being happy, any time things seemed okay I had this feeling at the back of my mind it wouldn’t last, that soon something would go wrong.

Looking back I realize I needed to break down in order to sort myself out. What killed me when I was down wasn’t what I was going through, but rather it was my holding on too tightly, hoping so much and waiting eagerly for things to change.

When it got really hard I created this place in my head where I just zoned off to…I needed to be numb, to not feel anything.


I was broken inside and in search of remedy. There was a period, I’ll stay up at night reading and going through people’s blog posts about how they got beat down by life and found their way back. I was searching for hope.   Then I discovered Travis Greene’s The Hill album and the book – When God doesn’t make sense by James C. Dobson. They really helped me find my way back.

Travis Greene’s album gave me inner peace and hope anew in God. Two things that stuck from the album is this – Trust God too much to give up and nothing happens to us, things happen for us ‘cus our God is intentional.

Dobson’s book taught me to let go and just live life because God didn’t owe me any explanation but one thing for sure was He got me and I was safe no matter what, whether I was passing through fire or having it easy, all I needed to do was just let go and live each day at a time.

I woke up and got out of the darkness. Life began to make sense again. I held on too tightly trying to fight it but the moment I let go, I could breathe again. 

2.         I’M NOT A HUSTLER:
There was this episode in the TV Legal series - Suits where one of Harvey’s clients was going to sell his company for a paltry sum. Harvey couldn’t understand why he wanted to let the company go. His client kept saying life is short.
After the client left, his new secretary explained to him that his friend just lost his best friend and has gotten to that point in life where you realize that money doesn’t really matter. All you desire is a quiet life, living peacefully and doing those things you truly love.

I got to that point in life in 2013 December. Working in Lagos got me there. I felt such pain, knew so much misery and unhappiness. When my lucky break came and I got transferred to Benin City, I began to actually live. I told myself I wasn’t going to waste this second chance I had. There is more to life than making money, working 24/7 and then you retire and you still keep hustling never really living life, enjoying it and all the beautiful moments. 
There was a time I was just floating, I was numb and existing. I got to a terrible point in life where I was basically breathing in misery every second. I was damn miserable because I was chasing after things that didn’t matter, holding on to what was killing me but thinking that was the route to the peak of my career and ultimate happiness on the long run. Total crap. 

I’m glad for that sour phase of my life because it’s what made me learn how to truly live life and appreciate the little things of life. I’m no more taking this thing called live all too seriously, just taking it step by step doing the things I really love. Everywhere you see people hustling, meanwhile their youth is passing them by. People try to make all the money in the world without actually enjoying the little things of life. I’m so over that.

There’s so much more that can be gotten out of life than flashy cars, land, buildings in every corner of the country and what not. I crave that intimate touch with life, that deep experience, the savouring of priceless moments, the arts, excitement over little things like hearing your favourite song on the radio or discovering new artists or hearing your fav song used as soundtrack in a movie/series, travelling and seeing new places, taking in the air, road trips, learning new things, or that beautiful connection when you meet someone who has interest in same hobbies as you.

It’s okay to be cautious but being too safe is not a good thing. Truth is ‘too safe’ is another word for fear. I had planned to travel and explore this year. It all seemed like a good idea till it got close to my vacation period. I started thinking maybe I should save the money especially now we are in recession. Actually that was what I was telling myself to prevent me from dealing with the truth - I was afraid. Sick thoughts kept running through my head, like what if I got involved in an accident or I get missing or I get kidnapped….smh
I almost cancelled my planned vacation till I remembered a line from one of my all-time favourite movies – A Cinderella story. “Don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game”. 
I conquered my own limitation but then I made the mistake of sharing my travel plans with people. People can be such dream killers. From one person to another my enthusiasm kept dying. Then I came across the below picture –

It would have been a big shame if I had indeed cancelled my travel plans because I ended up having the best vacation ever. I travelled, I did things I have always desired to, saw places and went to States I haven’t been to before. I actually drove on third mainland bridge. I, Sayi drove from Yaba to outskirts of Lagos, drove past Lekki and Ajah…something I never saw myself doing because I always felt Lagos roads were crazy.

4.         PEOPLE AIN’T SHIT
Loyalty is such a lonely word

It sucks big time when you realize that you are the one carrying the friendship on your head. I get that we are all grown up now with work pressures, family commitments and other stuff, but common if I put in effort, it’s only fair you put in effort too.
Everything can’t always be about you. One sided relationships are just the worst. Even if you are not putting the same 100% at least let me still see some effort from you. 
If you don’t reciprocate, I’ll walk away. I’m nobody’s fool. If I don’t mean as much to you then why am I bothering myself?
Two people really broke my heart this year. Not that I didn’t see it coming, I have been making excuses for them but then it got to a stage where I got fed up and realised I have been wasting my time hoping that someday they’ll change and actually care for the friendship as much as I did.
Last night I woke the fuck up” – Jon Bellion (Woke the f**k up)

“I am not broken, I’m not crying, I’m not crying
You aren’t trying hard enough
‘Till I realize, I’m just too much for you”– Beyonce (Don’t hurt yourself)

It’s simple – be with those who value you.

If it’s love you need, to give it is my joy” – Destiny’s Child (Cater 2 u) 
That some people are shit doesn’t mean I have to stop being who I am or totally give up on people (even though to a large extent people are really not it). 
I was discussing with Chiyenum one evening about how I’m tired of being there for people and no one seems to be there for me. I wanted for once to be catered for. 
“I’m left with no shoulder
But everybody wants to lean on me
I guess I’m their soldier
Well, who’s gonna be mine” – Beyonce (Save the hero) 
Financial independence is good and I’m grateful for that, grateful to be the one being there for people and not the other way around, but I think it would be really nice to have someone do nice stuff for me for a change. 
Scratch that thought! I once had that, heck, I have had those friends who did nice things for me but being the screwed up kid I am, I stopped them. I do not know how to let someone take care of me. 
Back to my conversation with Chiyenum, after ranting about wanting a break out of the normal routine and just really have someone treat me nice, he explained that some people are born to be givers. That even though people might exaggerate their situations and take advantage of their kind hearts, they will always be givers.

Being there for people gives me joy, solving issues for people and helping fix problems at work gives me joy. I just love giving relief to people. It’s who I am and that people are shitty shouldn’t change that.


Tuesday, 8 November 2016


#np: Unsteady - X-ambassadors

It hurts terribly when all you can do is watch while the people you care about go through pain.

There are things money can solve, but then there are also things money can’t solve. Those are the ones that hurt the most. Words can only go far in soothing pain.

We all have challenges in life, but some people have a greater measure...

They say ignorance is bliss. I agree. Sometimes not knowing gives you an easy way out. Being in the dark protects you.

Most times I tend to stay away, I try not to get close. I don't ask questions or want to know, not because I don't care, but because I know how messed up I can be emotionally. I hate seeing people go through difficulty, worse is when I’m in a helpless position to ease the pain.

There was a day I had to use my colleague's driver to go on a call. I was in a chatty mood that day. I felt like bonding with the driver. A young chap, agile and all (he is about four years older than me). I wanted to understand why he settled for driving at a young age when he could have tried some other more lucrative stuff.

I started by asking if he was married. He said he was. Then I asked if he had kids. He did; ‘three kids.’

We continued talking. He said he has been married for three years and I was like and you have three kids? So every year you were popping them out?

He said his wife had triplets but two of them died.

That moment I perished inside.

I went numb, not because he said two are dead, but because initially he said he has three kids. He obviously isn't over the loss of the kids. He still considers them. God!! People are hurting and going through pain in this life!

What kills me is our African culture of not knowing how to process pain. All we know how to say is God knows best, take heart, you are a man. Crap! Crap! Crap!

People are hurting and dying within themselves every day, hour, minute, second…. It's sad how we pay little importance to mental health in Nigeria.

I managed to mumble my condolence about the death of his kids then fell silent for the rest of the drive. I got reminded why I try not to get close or ask questions. Really, not knowing is the easy way out.

When I let someone in, I tend to let them in completely and I carry their hurt and pain like it's mine. I want to make them not feel pain, so imagine how horribly I feel when I see them hurting and I can't take away the hurt.

Some weeks ago my good friend, a married man, over forty years cried in my presence. My heart bled and it sucked so much because I couldn't reach out. We were in an open place and I knew he could use a hug but because of how messed up our society is, I couldn't even hold his hands, let him know he isn't alone or let him know I’ve got him.

Seeing those tears broke my heart into pieces and all I could think about is how unfair life is. He is the most humble and nicest person I know yet life has brought him to his knees.

He confided in me and told me how he was in so much pain one day, crying in front of his wife and he prayed aloud that since God doesn't want to take away his pain, he should just kill him but then he remembered his children...

I have four younger ones I care so much about. The lemons life has thrown them is enough to make drums, not even jars of lemonade. It breaks my heart because all I can do is talk and ask how they are doing, do one or two things to make them smile. But what they are going through, I may never be able to fully understand or comprehend. Sometimes I find myself wondering why isn't it me? Or if it were me how would I feel? Or how would I have handled it?

When they are down, I'm down. I've never really told them expressly but their pain is my pain. If I could, I would have taken their place.

Back then in university, I went through dark periods, suicidal thoughts and several periods of mood swings and depression. I had those days when I’d go to bed with a heavy heart. I’ll manage to sleep off and the pain goes away. I wake up feeling lighter and for a few minutes the world is fine. Then I remember…that moment a dark shadow falls over me and the hurting resumes.

This I went through all on my own, till I finally opened up to a few friends I was lucky enough to meet. I survived it but I lost something in the process. I became withdrawn and secluded. I grew up in a Christian family where prayers are supposed to make everything alright. It is faith above science (instead of both working together).

I was dealing with things I couldn't talk to any member of my family about. I got withdrawn gradually. I was lucky to find friends who I could talk to. The truth is, there is science and there is faith. I believe in God and I also believe He gave us science to apply in our daily lives. (I’ll leave this for another post).

During my dark days, I withdrew from my family because they didn't get me, prayers weren't what I needed. Since they wouldn't have understood, I had to seclude myself because I feared if they got too close they will see through me and see all my demons which I know they wouldn't understand.

Now this is affecting me badly. My younger one is hurting but I can't be there because we don't talk about those kind of things. All I do is watch from the distance and hurt and wonder, trying to figure what's going through that mind.

This is someone that looked all set for life, everything was going well and then life happened and everything totally changed course. Each day my mind drifts to the thought of what if things were different? I have to consciously kill such thoughts because I know they are not of any good.

Life happens; things change and we find ourselves in a whole new territory. We either wallow in self-pity and completely lose out on life or we chose to ride it and fight on.

When the issue was really bad, I wouldn't ask for results of the tests. I didn't want to know what the doctor said or what the options were. Oh wait, at first I did. But I realized I was losing it. It got to a point that my elder ones even began cautioning me as they felt I was now even becoming a bigger source of concern.

"My weakness is that I care too much” - Scars (Papa Roach)

I decided to step back and not know. When I leave the house I’m a totally different person. I laugh, I joke and I’m ever smiling. I've mastered the art of not letting my pain show.
I’m at a dilemma, do I keep my sanity safe by not knowing or do I reach out and then have my emotions tear me down?

Lately though, I decided to stop running. Get involved, but not too involved. What I’ve learnt is that the major thing about surviving pain or any situation we find ourselves is how we manage ourselves, our minds especially.

Thankfully things have improved a lot and I too have improved from living on the edge, thinking that one day it would all come crashing and we will back to where we began. Unconsciously I see myself counting the months things have been fine, trying to keep my hope going. Trying to not care too much but how can I not?

Not knowing gives ease, makes it easier for you to deal. But then, there are so many people out there hurting that need someone to lean on...

Not knowing is an easy way out but it’s not the best. No matter how much it hurts, we should strive to be there for others.

‘Being there for others, because you know what it’s like to not have anyone there for you…’

Sunday, 9 October 2016

LESSONS FROM ENUGU (be nice to those who cook/handle your food)

From the moment I got the mail informing me of a one week training in Enugu, all I could think of was how superb it would to be off work. It was going to be my pre-leave, after all we now have pre everything abi? From pre-wedding pictures to pre-birthday pictures to even pre-sex pictures *smh
I really didn’t care for the course content, all I needed was the time away from the office. The only thing I had to contend with was packing. I hate packing. Worse, I hate unpacking after a trip. I didn’t want to pack too much but yet I couldn’t seem to know just exactly how much to pack for a one week trip neither did I want to be the one with the biggest bag.
Sometimes I wish work was like school days, where you go on breaks in between semesters, like we have first term, second term and third term with a month’s break in between (this is the point I envy teachers). I mean, working month after month from January to December is kind of killing. The one month leave is really not enough. Maybe if it were the standard 8:00am to 5:00pm kind of job it would have been much easier, but 7:30am till God knows when with some work filled weekends can be quite the kill.
This post isn’t about me whining about my unending work hours. It’s about my beautiful trip to the Coal City, though it was almost marred when Franklin and I broke the golden rule - don’t offend the person that cooks your food.
Before going to a new city, it’s normal to have expectations or opinions, based on what we have heard or read. Two things surprised me about Enugu –
-       The city has very good roads, and it was quite impressive. The neatness of the roads is also worthy of mention.(yet in Benin City we say Oshiomhole is working, correction, worked during his first tenure)
-      One thing that really got me surprised, was the music played by the radio stations. The plan was to go with my headphone but when Elvis saw the picture of the beats by Dre pro on instagram, he said it wouldn’t follow me back to Benin. That was the point I decided it would be a no music trip. I’ll keep my ears buds free to enjoy the natural sounds. I totally ruled out enjoying any form of music from the stereo as I expected it will be kparakpor all the way, with OAPs trademarked by their deep Ibo accent.
I was totally impressed with the jams the radio stations played, right from Anambra to Enugu State. It was like the stations stole my playlist. Both recent and old jams were played. It was all hits, back to back!
At a filling station where we stopped to buy gas I heard Troye Sivan’s Wild playing from the speakers of the station. I couldn’t hold it anymore. I had to let it out and express my amazement at the quality of music the radio stations had been playing, I never experredit! Even stations in Benin hardly play Troye Sivan!
At the training venue, the first thing we saw after we had settled down was a slide show. The first slide had some questions against a black background, first questions was – why are you here?
I laughed.
Next thing that popped on the screen – because HR asked you to?
Followed by – You needed time off work?
Hehehe…Whoever prepared the slides read my mind.
On Tuesday evening, Franklin and I went down to the hotel’s restaurant to order our dinner. The person on duty that evening was different from the guy who had been there since our arrival that Sunday. The new guy got our billing wrong. Franklin got really pissed and insisted the boy speaks to his Manager. He left us and came back few minutes later saying he hadn’t been briefed by the person who handed over to him about the concession for us.
Franklin was having none it and asked to see the Manager himself. Well, I tried to persuade him that it wasn’t necessary but Franklin insisted. Off we went. The guy followed us.
Franklin hadn’t finished making his complaints when the Manager turned to the guy and gave him a total dress down. He practically tore him apart with harsh words right there at the lobby in front of everyone. Gosh! I felt so bad, but what could I do? Some people and their awful disciplinary skills though. Well, I know that’s what most pissed-off customers want to see - an erring sales person being properly chided by their boss. But common, you can reprimand in a civil way without taking away their dignity.
The Manager apologized to us and finished the boy off with a promise to sanction him appropriately. We placed our orders and after a while the same boy brought our meals to our individual rooms. Around 4:00am I woke up with a sharp stomach pain…the pain was so terrible, at first I thought it was PUD again but after a while I knew this was something else. That was the end of sleep, at some point I had to rest on the toilet floor. It was that bad.
I felt a bit better at the break of dawn. I wasn’t myself, then I saw Franklin, he too wasn’t looking good. We began asking people if they too had stomach upset, maybe it was the food, but everyone who ate same thing were all fine. That day was horrid for both of us. We spent a better part of the training period lying down outside.
At a point I had to say what was on my mind. I asked Franklin if he wasn’t sure the guy we reported hadn’t poisoned us out of anger, because it seemed too much of a coincidence that it was just both of us having the pain meanwhile other people that ate same thing were all okay. To top it all, our food was brought by the same guy!
Franklin said we had to pally the guy immediately we got to the hotel that evening. I quickly agreed o, I didn’t go to Enugu to get killed ni.
The moment we got to the hotel, we headed straight for the restaurant hoping to see our ‘dear friend’. Thankfully he was on duty. Maybe we were giving the warning dose, we had to make amends before he gave us the final dose and that would have been it for us.
We exchanged pleasantries, made small talk with him before chipping in that we didn’t expect his Manager would react that way and hope he didn’t punish him as he had threatened. The conversation went well. We sat for a while and discussed football with the guy for about ten more minutes before leaving.
Honestly, I was scared of ordering food or eating again in that hotel. But it was already late, I couldn’t go out to get food. The pain had subsided and it seemed the guy had forgiven us. I had no choice, I needed to eat because I barely had anything to eat all day due to the pain. I went for something totally different from what I had been eating since my arrival.
That’s when I stumbled into t it – fried goat meat.
I’m not really the beef eating kind of guy.  I hate anything beef. I tried eating ram one time, it didn’t go well with my system so basically I wrote off meat including goat meat. All I’ve been eating for years now is poultry products and snail (as far as I didn’t see the bird alive or I didn’t partake in its killing).
Staring at me were three pieces of goat meat. The first bite got me regretting all the times I had goat meat in my food but gave it out. Now I’m officially hunting fried goat meat, well for someone who hardly goes out that’s going to be one hell of a hunt.