Saturday, 28 September 2019

CONQUERING MOUNT KILIMANJARO (Adventure of a lifetime)


Hiking Mount Kilimanjaro which magnificently stands at 5,985meters above sea level has been a major bucket list item for years. My interest was established in 2014 when @Osams summited it, though much thought was not given to it until June 2018.





Rooftop Gang




While flying back to Nigeria from Zanzibar last year, I caught a glimpse of the mountain peak and my interest got reignited. It was like the Universe had it all planned out as a month later I saw a tweet from @Tvpadventure advertising a trip to climb Kilimanjaro slated for August 2019. It felt like an opportunity of a lifetime. Without giving a second thought, (I had not even chosen my leave dates for 2019) I sent a message that I was interested.









A Whatsapp group was opened, we called ourselves the Rooftop gang. Information was disseminated about the climb including workout routines to get us fit. Yours truly didn’t hit the gym once in preparation for the trip. I did my best to skip every morning, and also did lazy sit ups. I later realized for real, the hike was really not for the strong, fittest nor swift, it was more of a mental battle.





Two things I feared will pose major challenge for me were - cold and the infamous altitude sickness. Thankfully there was remedy for both; stack up on thermal wears for the cold and a drug – Diamox for the altitude sickness. Due to my medical history, I was skeptical about taking Diamox, though I had it in my backpack for emergency purposes. I made sure I adhered strictly to the advice @Osams gave me, and which was also reiterated at the camp before we began the hike –





  1. Drink a lot of water (atleast 3 litres daily)
  2. Go slowly at your own pace (this would enable you acclimatize to the reduced oxygen level as you go higher in altitude).




I was excited to meet the people I had been in a group with for over a year, exchanging ideas and fears about how terrified we were about the hike. We hit it off immediately we met, deep down I knew it was going to be a very interesting gang.









On arriving Moshi, we were welcomed by the tour company in charge of the hike - @eco_africaclimbing. We were given a pep talk about the climb after which our gear was inspected and those that needed more items were asked to rent (the tour company assisted here).





I
needed to rent extra gloves and ski pants (both came in handy later on). Other
items I rented were sleeping bag and trekking poles.









The
first day of the trek started with us checking our pulse and oxygen level. This
was done subsequently every morning and evenings to monitor our health (to
ensure we were acclimatizing well).









We checked out of the hotel in Moshi and headed for @ecoafricaclimbing's office to weigh our luggage. Each of us had porters (Kili fighters) assigned to us. They helped carry our duffel bags (which contained our supplies and other personal effects) from camp to camp. We were to hike with just our day packs. Each porter is allowed to carry a maximum of 15kg, and when the sleeping bag is added a maximum load of 20kg. You have to watch what you pack, else you would need to hire an extra porter at more cost.









We had a one hour drive from Moshi to Machame gate of the mountain. We completed the park registration formalities, had a quick lunch and off we went. The journey began and it felt pretty normal as we laughed and chatted along. We had no idea what lay ahead of us in the coming days.









We walked a distance of about 9km from the gate to the first camp site. This was approximated to take 6 hours but the group did it in about 7 hours. Personally I did it in 9 hours, getting to camp after dark to meet the others already seated for dinner. The terrain was a bit flat, rainforest with cool weather. This gave a false idea of what was to come.





Initially I was walking fast, complaining that walking slow was making me feel tired but I remembered the advice to go slowly (go pole pole as the Tanzanians would say). I also realized taking deep breaths at intervals helped. I slowed down and joined the back benchers’ team. A team I never left till we descended the mountain on the final day.









As regards the meals we were served, I came prepared with an open mind because I had read in the brochure that meals will be prepared with focus on the nutritional content over taste. I was ready to eat crap. I always pictured brown watery soup anytime I thought of the meals we will be served.









But boy! I was blown away by the food provided. At a time I had to say they were on a mission to kill us with food. We even had chicken pizza up there on the mountain, fries and ketchup, fruits every day, Quaker oat and what not. Don’t ask me how all these came about because I too don’t know how they managed this.









I’m still looking forward to the camp experience I have in my head, the one I experienced up the mountain doesn’t count. The cold every night didn’t allow me enjoy it and the tents were so small, getting in and out, as I told my tent mate, seemed to be just as hard as the long hikes every day.









My first night in the tent was horrible.













I am a bit claustaphobic.





I woke up middle of the first night breathing heavily, taking off layers of my clothes quickly as I felt I was suffocating. I tore the zip of the tent open so I could get in more air.





The first thing that registered in my head was altitude sickness. After managing to calm myself down, I realized I didn’t have any headache neither was I dizzy, so it definitely wasn’t altitude sickness.





I was reacting to the tiny tent. It took me a while to calm myself down mentally, thankfully this occurred just that first night. I quickly got used to the annoying tiny tent which was such a chore getting in and out of till the very last day.













Our morning routine had the guides waking everyone by 6:30am from tent to tent, after which the chef provided each tent with a cup of either tea or coffee. A bowl of warm water was later brought for washing which we mostly used for teeth brushing. We didn’t have our bath for the 7 days we were on the climb. I doubt any of us had sweat on our bodies as the cold was on throughout the day. Sometimes it got weird, while hiking we felt both heat and cold at the same time.









Each morning the tents were dismantled and the porters carried everything to the next camp site. The porters were better referred to as Kili fighters, to be honest they were the heroes of the hike. We always left them behind every morning but yet they managed to pass us on the way with so much load on their backs and always set up the new campsite before we got there. As if that’s not enough, after setting up the tents they always made their way back the trail to help us with our day packs or some bring us food and water.  Angels in human form.









We continued our ascent the next day. By then no one needed to advise us to make our day pack as light as possible. I think its best to avoid taking a DSLR camera when hiking Mount Kilimanjaro. I ended up keeping mine aside and relied mostly on phone photography to get rid of the excess weight from the camera.





We hiked our way to Shira caves on the second day. The views of the mountain was breath-taking. I was able to capture the sunset at the camp which was pitched just beside the clouds.









Third day was the most challenging. The trail was steep and the weather unfriendly. The strong winds made the air very harsh to breathe in. I remember while walking through a rocky valley, I started reciting ‘Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil’.









I had to remind myself of my past hiking experiences for motivation. From hiking to and fro Industrial Training classes in NIFOR, to hiking Owu waterfalls and Farin Ruwa waterfalls in Kwara and Nassarawa States respectively and then, hiking Mabira forest in Uganda.









The clips we watched online before the camp and stories we read about hiking Kilimanjaro didn’t do justice as per what we actually experienced on the hike.









This was real and we were living through hard times. We were like the Israelites making our way through the wilderness, only this time na we carry our hand pay big money to suffer. I was like is this really how I am spending my vacation?









We had
initially planned to trek to Lava Tower first, then make a decent to the
Barranco camp but along the way we decided against going to the Lava Tower so
we could get to the camp before night fall. We slept at 3900meters above sea
level in Barranco camp.





The road less traveled




We woke up the fourth day ready to climb the much talked about ‘Breakfast Wall’. It was described to us like a herculean task, but I think I found it much easier than I had dreaded it.









After successfully climbing the wall, we rested before making our way to Karanga valley. The journey to Karanga camp was a short journey compared to the long walks we had been doing before.









Fifth day had us walking a distance of just 4km, the shortest ever. We marched along pole pole as we enjoyed the music provided by our guide. We followed the track to Barafu Camp.









The day felt relatively easy, maybe we were mentally excited about the short walk for the day. The major challenge we faced was seeing the camp but realizing there was a very large steep we had to surmount. We were so close, yet so far. The weather was also in perfect condition.





Thankfully it never rained while we hiked the mountain, save on the last night when we descended. I can’t even imagine how horrible it would have been climbing steep rocks in the rain.









We had half a day to rest before the war summit started. I think personally, I underestimated the final hike to Uhuru peak. Others were visibly worried about it but I had little or no fear. I felt it would be like maybe the third day but a bit colder. Honestly, I had no idea what I was in for. It was rough and had me contemplating my life. We started out by 12:00am. Other hiking groups had already lined up and started their way up the summit before us.





In the dark I could see several rows of headlamps lighted up all the way. I stopped at a point and wondered if we were not all mad. I mean, which sane person would leave the comfort of his/her bed to hike a mountain at midnight in the damn cold? At that point I had to wonder if I had not made a mistake because all the money I spent on the trip was enough to book me fancy holidays in Seychelles, Mauritius and Maldives.





I was there and that was the last night, no need crying over spilled milk. I sojourned on.





That's Kola, struggling to get to the top at dawn. That's how most of us were, some even in worse shape




I had been very cautious of what I ate, selecting appetizers and desserts during meals to avoid stomach issue but apparently, the war I thought I won was a fluke. My village people were holding the last card which they decided to play on that very summit night.





I had a painful stomach upset that had me going behind rocks covered in snow to send a message three times right there in the open mountain. Thankfully it was night and visibility was very poor, quite embarrassing still. It took one of the guides running up to catch up with one of the hikers in my group to get me medication before my stomach settled. Honestly I never knew my village people were that strong and that their hand would meet me at 5,000m above sea level.









As we kept going, I became extremely sleepy. I tried stopping for naps but the kili fighter who was assigned to me, David, refused to let me sleep. He warned me if I did, I will wake up frozen just like my water bottle and its content. To be very honest, I would not have made it to the peak if not for David. He was my hero and kept encouraging me.





By daybreak, I had reached a flat surface but the journey was still far. There were no more steeps as such, I started seeing a lot of people descending who had successfully sumitted. They kept encouraging me that the peak was close by.









I noticed I was breathing through my mouth and was not able to sustain breathing through my nostrils. I started to panic. I asked David where the oxygen tank was, he said the head guide, Alex, was carrying it and he was right behind us. I told him we had to wait for him as I was bothered about my breathing. Half of me thought I was coming down with altitude sickness because the oxygen level was very low at that altitude, the other half thought it was my health issue.





The first day our heart rate was taken, mine was the highest and they thought I was scared. I calmly told them there was no cause for alarm as I had tachycardia.









Alex asked if I felt dizzy or had headache, I said no to both. He said I didn’t have altitude sickness and breathing through the mouth is common at that altitude, that I can keep going, or I could get to Stella point (5,756m absl), take a picture and start descending.





My silly head, was still worrying and I shamelessly tried to talk him into giving me oxygen. Anyway David and I continued the trek but I was still worried. What if it was the tachycardia? Did I come all this way to die? Especially as my parents thought I was in Lagos. I made a pact with myself that the minute I felt the slightest pain in my chest I would start descending.









We got
to Stella point. I didn’t give the signage a second look. I walked on towards
Uhuru Peak (5,895m absl). Something in me got struck. I was like, when they
advertised the trip, no one ever mentioned Stella point, so why will Alex tell
me to snap and descend here? I was acting drama in my head, meanwhile my body
was broken and ready to drop.









I was
so spent, I stopped almost every five minutes to catch my breath. I was as good
as a dead man walking. My trekking poles were frozen and covered in snow. My
luck was I changed to gloves that didn’t have the finger compartment demarcated,
so I was able to push the hand warmer to my fingers. This prevented me from
having frozen fingers.





I got so weak I didn’t know if I was going unconscious or just sleepy. I sat down on a rock and went blank for a minute. Till date I don’t know if I dozed off or if I was unconscious. Thanks to David for shaking me. All I know was, everywhere was dark and peaceful. After that I dreaded the thought of taking a nap.





Favs...




After
walking for almost an hour I sighted people gathered in front, that’s when I
knew I had made it! I was right there at the peak of the intimidating Mount
Kilimanjaro. I made out some of my group members. Energy from nowhere came upon
me. I walked to them, we hugged and celebrated.





This
was where it got intensely personal for me.





I stood looking at the signage. The moment was heavy. It felt unreal, me standing there.  It was so powerful, everything I had been through to get to the summit hit me. Also, the fact that I made it despite surviving two heart conditions in the past (well still managing one) and also some of my friends said I’d not reach the summit.





The moment became emotional for me. At first it was just sighs, then later sobs, and before I knew it, the tears flowed freely.









I bet
no one knew why I was all up in my feelings but that was an unimaginable moment
for me. That was me conquering myself, my body and every limitation my body had
thrown at me and I did this without taking the Diamox drug. My proudest moment
and I couldn’t contain it.





Conqueror of Mt. Kilimanjaro!




Time
to go down and the energy disappeared. My head began to spin, to cut the story
short, David had to support me all the way down to the camp.





We thought our woes were over but little did we know to exit the mountain, it was going to be a two day journey. There was a 10 hours walk awaiting us on the final day. The walk to the gate the next day was the finally suffering. I was glad to do it though, I mean, I couldn’t wait to get off the mountain and get back to civilization. Mostly I couldn’t wait to hit the shower.









On getting to the gate, one of the guides asked if I will recommend the hike to anyone, I said yes, to my enemies. That was on a light note though.





If you
love hiking or adventure, I think this is the ultimate adventure you can
experience. It was tough yea, but it gave me a wonderful experience with
nature, one I had been craving for months. Those long quiet walks gave me free
hours with no internet interruptions to dig into my head and clear so much
clutter. I had the time to reflect properly, take in the beautiful views on the
way up the mountain and feel connected to nature.









If you ever choose to hike Kilimanjaro, I strongly recommend you go with @eco_africa climbing. Asides the awesome meals, you will meet guides and kili fighters who are genuinely interested in you succeeding in your quest. One thing that stood out, was as at summit night, our group was the only group that didn’t have to carry their bags themselves as the kili fighters and guides assisted us with them. I don’t know if I would have made it to the top with the extra weight, going without any bag was almost an impossible task on its own.









Now I have satisfied my one week with nature away from the world/internet, I crave a few days of quiet in a cabin in the woods. I can’t wait to bring this dream to life.





That’s the thing about travel, once you catch the bug, it never stops. You keep dreaming and itching for the next experience…





I will recommend reading Suzzane’s blog post about our hike. She gave a detailed breakdown of gear items one would need for the trip. You can also view my Kilimanjaro highlights on my instagram profile for more pictures of the climb.


Saturday, 17 August 2019

SALLAH IN LEBANON


Touring Lebanon has always been a bucket list item, though I wasn’t keen on it thanks to the media portrayal of the country. Like my last minute decision to tour U.A.E, this trip came as an afterthought when plans for my preferred trip got cancelled.





I’m glad I embarked on the trip even though it had me exceeding my travel budget for the Sallah break. Lebanon turned out to be a beautiful dream, full of pleasant surprises. I fell in love with the city for real. Initially I had little expectations, I remember my colleague teasing all I would see while landing would be lots of hijabs and turbans. Well, I never saw anyone wearing such all through my tour, save a few Muslim women on hijabs but most were on your typical casual western wears.









Lebanon is as civilized as any country you can think of. Most persons feel it’s filled with religious extremists, maybe due to events of the civil war but the city has moved past that. From my personal experience I can say the city is relatively safe, at least those areas not flagged red (the non-red areas are more in number).





As usual, I signed up for a group travel deal with @Nigerianstraveltoo (Solo travel is still not for me). We were four in number,  three amazing ladies and myself (but seriously why don’t Nigerian men like to travel?) This was my second group trip where I was the only guy. I have a feeling this won’t be the last. That’s not an issue for me anyway, both trips have been exciting and the ladies have always brought intriguing personalities I easily vibe with.





The gang




I told myself I was going to loosen up on this trip and go with the flow, explore everything, especially the nightlife Lebanon is renowned for. Thankfully Cecilia was there to ginger all of us to explore stuff we were lazy about trying out.





The influencer




We arrived Beirut at about 3:00am. The route we took to the
hotel from the airport gave us a wrong impression of the city. We were soon to
realize that Beirut is one of those cities that never sleeps, thanks to their
active night life – pubs and clubs which open every day.





After our breakfast, we were picked up by our amazing tour guide @pubscrawlbeirut and set out on a trip to Baalbek where we explored the Roman ruins in Lebanon. (For my music lovers, at this point can I say good western music is not lost on Lebanon. The road trip to Baalbek was spiced with the latest jams from the West, a radio station even played ‘Be alright’ by Dean Lewis!)









We had a short stop at the spot where the largest man-made stone is located.









From here we continued the journey to Baalbek.









Baalbek used to be a place for worship. It was a center for Mesopotamian, Islamic, Roman and Christian worshipers. The added modifications on the buildings by each religious group on the left overs of the monument are still visible. We were told that two different earthquakes resulted in the destruction of most of the structures.









There was a museum at the Baalbek which we had to walk down a stair to access.









From there we drove back to town where we had wine tasting and food tasting.









This was my first encounter with true Lebanese food as we had continental dish at the hotel.









I love how food spread always looks so amazing in pictures even though their taste is totally off. One free advice, if you are Nigerian and you want to visit Lebanon, please go along with dry pepper.









It’s beginning to feel like it’s just Nigerians that love spicy food. I mean, this is the same thing I experienced when I toured East Africa, lack of pepper in their meals.









The second day we started out with a city tour of Beirut. We stopped at Pigeon rock which I understood is one of the signature spots of Lebanon. If you don't visit here, they say you have not really been to Beirut.









We had a brief stop at the ‘I love Beirut’ signage…this
picture later meant so much to me because indeed I fell in love with Beirut.









Another quick stop at the Mohammed Al-Amin Mosque (also
referred to as the blue mosque).









From here we embarked on a long drive to the Jetta Grotto. We took a cable car from the parking lot to the Grotto. Finally I had a cable ride!! I remember visiting Obudu Cattle Ranch in Calabar some years back anticipating the cable car ride only to find out it was no longer functional.





The Jetta Grotto was one hell of a magical trip. Unfortunately
cameras are no longer allowed in. You can do well to google it to get an idea
of what it looks like, but I can tell you for free that pictures and videos
will not do it justice. You need to be there to experience it.





The Grotto has an upper and lower cave made of karstic
limestone that are both interconnected. The best part is the lower grotto that
channels an underground river, where we took a short boat ride over the still
waters. We were in awe throughout the tour of both the upper and lower cave.









Next tour stop was at Harissa (Our mother of Lebanon Statue). Harissa is one of the most important shrines in the world honoring Mary, Mother of Jesus. The shrine is highlighted by a huge 15 ton bronze statue. It is 8.5m high and has a diameter of 5m. I was so engrossed in climbing to the top of the statue to capture the amazing view of the city I forgot to capture the statue itself. The statue stretches her hands towards Beirut, overlooking the bay of Jounieh.









From the top we took in the views and watched people paragliding,
after which we took another cable car from Harissa to city of Jounieh.









We took a short journey to another part of Lebanon – Byblos where
we checked in to another hotel.





Tired from the day’s activities, I skipped the exploration of Byblos, had a meal I brought to life by adding pepper I carried from Nigeria and went to bed awaiting the exploration of the nightlife.









Night life in Byblos was very eventful. The souks (market stalls) which were filled with wares during the day time turned into a hub of social hangouts at night. We had a nice time hanging out at an outdoor restaurant before heading to a nearby pub where we had drinks, played games and danced till about 2:00am.









The third day we checked out of the hotel in Byblos, had a
beach hangout at the Baracuda beach before heading back to Beirut.









We rested before going out once again to enjoy the active nightlife of Lebanon. It was a relief letting my guard down and doing stuff out of my daily routine back at home. Took several tequila shots (my first time),hung out at three pubs before ending up at a big club that at a point felt like the MTV awards after party. The night was awesome, we were young, wild & free.









The following day was a free day for us. It was supposed to be a rest day but we ended up perambulating the city. From the mall to a thrift shop, to hanging out with my Lebanese friend – Radwan. He treated us to a feast, this time the food was much better, actually felt like the last supper. From here we retired to the hotel to prepare for our flight back to reality Nigeria, which was for 3:00am.






Monday, 29 July 2019

MUSIC REVIEW - The Lion King: The Gift (Beyonce)


N/B: I know this review is coming two weeks late. I needed to be
sure I was not making the same mistake I did with Everything is love (joint
album by Jay-z and Beyonce). The excitement that gets me with every new Beyonce
album release is real. I remember on first listen I felt like wow! This album
is so great! But later on, I realized how underwhelming it actually was.





I had to take my time with this album. I needed the euphoria to die down, so I can have an objective review of the album.





shot from Spirit Video (lead single from the album)




Just when you think Beyonce can’t set the bar any higher, she goes right on and blows your mind! See, no one, I mean it, not one commercial artist out there comes close to Beyonce when it comes to developing a concept around an album. She started with Beyonce LP, perfected it with Lemonade and now, she's gone all out on this album.





Beyonce is no stranger to experimenting with afrobeats (cue Grown Woman), which she nailed by the way. When she released the album’s tracklist, I was curious to hear how she'll sound with the featured African artists, will her star power over shadow them? Mostly I wanted to hear if the production was going to feel genuine or imported. She got this right by working closely with African producers, the production on each track sounded authentic.





Here’s my track by track review -





BIGGER





This is another top notch album opener from Beyonce. This song is on same level of greatness as Lemonade’s opening track (Pray you catch me), but this one hits even harder with life saving lyrics which are built around the theme of getting balance in life.





“If you feel insignificant, you better think again
Better wake up because you're part of something
way bigger
You're part of something way bigger”





Beyonce delivers one of her most flawless vocal performance on this track. The song starts on a mellow tone, steadily building till the climax at the song’s bridge where Beyonce belts out perfect notes which I dare anyone to criticize.





FIND YOUR WAY BACK





This song gives you a taste of
what’s to come as per the afro-beat influenced concept which the album is
centred around.





I think this is a brilliant follow
up to Bigger, feels like a continuation of the message about finding your
purpose and balance.





“Big, big world, but you got it, baby
Find your way back, don't let this life drive
you crazy”





The Bridge of this song was such a pleasant reminder of the shock I felt, when I heard Bankulli singing in Yourba (Rikirobo roborebe, mamasibo robirebi rebi...) at the beginning of the interlude preceding this track.





DON’T JEALOUS ME





This track had performances by three Nigerian artists - Tekno, Yemi Alade and Mr. Eazi. This was an opportunity for them to show the world how great they are, but alas! the hallmark of Nigerian music industry came to the fore – shitty lyrics! Sigh.





This song shouldn’t have been on the album. I might even delete it
from my copy of the album. I get the production was great, catchy and very
danceable but it’s time we changed the narrative that sound is all that matters
when it comes to Nigerian music. Lyrical depth should matter.





Yemi Alade was the major disappointment here. I half expected that I would get to hear her matching Beyonce’s vocals on the album. I guess I hoped for too much. Sometimes I wonder if this is the same Yemi Alade that once blessed us with mad vocals on her Duro Timi song. Babe forever stays wasting her fire vocals, tragic.





JA
ARA E





Burna Boy has definitely lived up to his self-hype of African giant! I mean, he got a solo on Beyonce’s album!!





I love how this song goes easy on the ears, sampling Fela’s characteristic afrobeat sound. Burna Boy was spectacular on this track, perfect redemption from that “Don’t jealous me” hot mess by fellow Nigerian artists.





NILE





Seriously Beyoncé and Kendrick Lamar decided to give us less than 2minutes of this? I feel they robbed us of what would have been another a dope collaboration by both of them (reminiscence Freedom on Lemonade LP).





MOOD
4 EVA





This is exactly what Beyoncé was going for on Everything is love album. The bragging, bars spitting vibe worked so well. One track on the album with her sing-rapping skills was hot, unlike having several of such as in EIL album. I think just like myself, majority of listeners prefer a singing Beyonce over a sing-rapping Bey. Childish Gambino rocked the bridge of this song so well, bringing a fresh experience to the song.





Big ups to Jay Z for shouting out Lagos
on this track.Thumbs up to Dj
Khaled, for a job well done producing afrobeats with co-producer Just Blaze.





The song in itself, is a whole mood.





WATER





Another fire track here. The momentum of the album is building fast and you can feel the African in you kicking in already. It features a Cameroonian artist – Salatiel, who holds his own perfectly well in this collaboration with heavy weights - Pharrell Williams & Beyoncé. You definitely can’t sit still listening to this song with the heavy African drums hitting hard.





BROWN
SKIN GIRL





This is an afro dancehall collaboration by Beyonce and Wizkid with contributions from Blue Ivy and SAINt
JHN.





This song here is the core of the album. The most important and impactful track. Wizkid got the best feature.





I love how Beyonce stayed back and allowed Wizkid take the first
verse & chorus. She gave our boy a chance to shine, and shine did he!





I never for once thought I would live to see the day Beyonce and
Wizkid would harmonize on a track. Their chemistry was effortless.





KEYS
TO THE KINGDOM





This collaboration by Tiwa Savage & Mr. Eazi could easily be mistaken for a love song. Tiwa’s vocals were so soothing over the mid tempo afrobeats. She carried this song, Mr. Eazi really wasn’t needed. (I still hold a grudge for his part on Don’t Jealous Me).





Asides, Wizkid and Burna Boy, Tiwa Savage also delivered a stellar performance on the album. Funny, when I saw the released tracklist I feared she was going to ruin it with one of her gra gra performances, but baby girl blew my mind.





ALREADY





Just when you thought the tempo of the album peaked with Brown
Skin Girl, here comes this Afropop song with Beyonce and Ghanaian artist, Shatta
Wale to put you back in the groovy mood! Notice how Beyonce sounds Nigerian
whenever she pronounced already with the stress on ‘dy’.





OTHERSIDE





This song is a spiritual experience. It delivers well on the theme of the afterlife. I felt the solemnness of the song from the start but then, I got an even deeper feel when the outro which had Bankulli singing in Yoruba (Yet another pleasant surprise) and Beyoncé chanting in Swahili came on. This is one of my favourite on the album, and it always takes me to another realm with every listen.





MY
POWER





I bet you thought the party was over after Otherside? Like the name goes, this track is a powerful anthem. From start to end, the energy never dies. I love Tierra Whack’s verse and of course, Beyonce went off when she came on with “Get loose, get loose, get low, get low…oh, gotta protect my braids/keep it locked in a safe/Don’t make me get back to my ways/My power, they’ll never take”





There was a brief Yemi Alade feature on this track, emphasis on
brief, thankfully.





SCAR





This song by 070 Shake & Jessie Reyez, is one sound that didn’t fit well on the album, though the theme is an insight to Scar’s perspective in the movie. As a standalone track, I think it would have been very good, that’s if you take away the verse by Jessie Reyez.





I love the darkness in the
verses done by 070 Shake and how her voice carries the emotions.





I wonder how it, how
it went so wrong

It's been so dark, yeah, I wanna say my last
goodbyes
And I'll be gone for good
Left you guys behind, now I'm so lonely, so
lonely, ooh





Sorry, sorry
My whole family, I
Slayed you, betrayed you
Don't you grow to be like me
I wander, sink in to the darkest sea…”





SPIRIT





This was released a week before the full project. I was already
familiar with it. So listening to the other songs had me wondering if this
track fits in the album, would it have been better left alone in the previously
released The Lion King OST album?.





But getting to this song after journeying through the album had me appreciating the song even more. The song felt purposeful and important as the album closer. It was aptly placed as the last track. The perfect climax that proudly brings the album to a resounding glorious end.





WATCH THE EXTENDED VIDEO OF SPIRIT + BIGGER HERE - https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=hiqLtqMDrXQ





This is indeed a well curated album, and it delivered exactly on
what Beyonce was after - creating an album to tell the story of The Lion King
movie. This is not your typical Beyonce album (something
we all know she delivers well on). This album speaks more of her creative genius.
Her ability to visualize a concept and bring it to life is ever so impressive. A
true artist.





It might easily be slept on but those interludes (excerpts from dialogues in the movie) if paid proper attention, give the album a much more relatable experience.





This album is truly a gift to Africa and a love letter as Beyonce
called it.





I will give this album a strong 4/5. People are already tipping it for Album of the year nod, the nomination may come but we all know how racist the Grammy’s has been to Beyonce, worse an AOTY win means all the featured artists too will get the award. The Grammys will rather get brunt down by dragons than let Africans win in that category.





P/S: This is definitely not B7. Someone please tell Beyonce we are still waiting for that solo 7th album!


Saturday, 29 June 2019

MOVING ON…


Few days ago I woke up to this song
playing – Recover by X Ambassadors off of their new album (Orion).





The lyrics hit me – “I will recover, I’ll
be okay, I’m gonna own my pain...”





I had been pissed about a situation I
led myself into. I was having misplaced anger towards my ex, though I was the
one who initiated contact while I was in Lagos at the beginning of the month.





I went looking for closure. I needed
to get the load I had been carrying for months off my chest. We talked about
all that went wrong, where it all fell apart and we left each other feeling
better for it that day.





While we talked that day, I could see
reasons why we were never meant for each other. I wish I stopped there and I didn’t
try to follow up via chatting or try to force a friendship. I pride myself as
the guy who remains friends, or best friends with his exes, but I have now come
to realize the friendship will happen in its own time, or may not happen at all.





After getting back to Benin City, we continued
communicating via chats. I noticed I was the one always initiating the chats
(this was one issue we always had when we were together). This was sorted out. We
began to derail, talks about getting back together started coming up.





We continued communicating and my
feelings got messed up. Things fell apart September last year, though we tried
to work things out but it was never the same. I think for me, I was done for
real that September, even though a part of me found it hard letting it go.





We broke it off officially in December
last year. Moving on has never been easy for me, I mean, it once took me a year
to move on from someone I barely dated for two months. This time around, I knew
I was in for it for real, being that we were together for a year plus. I
refused to go the easy way of rebound or quickly dating someone else, (does it
really work though?) I wanted to heal for real, allow time do what it knows how
to do best.





I thought I was ready to put myself
out there in May. After a disastrous attempt at starting a new relationship, getting
reacquainted with my ex felt like a breather. It was comforting chatting with
someone familiar, someone I was used to (dating/starting afresh, getting to
know someone anew and striking a balance is such an extreme sport). Chatting
with my ex reminded me of the good days when we started, it felt easier. I was
missing the feeling and not the person. I didn’t realize this then.





I have been secluding myself from
people since September last year. My detaching from people got triggered when I
realised most of the so called friends acquaintances I made online were
the ones flirting with my babe. Something in me broke and I realized, people
will always be shit, especially this generation where loyalty is rare and
people keep saying online is not real life.





Turns out my ex is still friends with
one of the ‘friends’. I made it known I was not going to stick around for that,
even though I understood the peculiarity of the situation they currently were
in. I endured enough disrespect while we were together, all those meaningless
flirting with my friends. Till now I have still not been given an answer why
that even happened. All I get is declaration of love and that the others never
mattered. So why then? You had a good thing but you just had to ruin it. Sometimes,
humans amaze me. What was I expecting? This was same person who admitted to
cheating on previous ex by having flings while their relationship was on. Why
did I ever think I won’t get same treatment?





I made it know I was not going to
stick around while their friendship continued. I know it’s ridiculous to ask
another to choose between you and someone. Maybe it’s a complex, I don’t really
care. I have since come to realize I am not the guy people choose. It might as
well be linked to my not being able to handle rejection. I ride so hard for my
friends and I expect same level of energy from them but what do I get in
return?





Maybe I am really that jealous best
friend or boyfriend who doesn’t like sharing. The way I know how to deal with
jealousy is to walk away. I don’t know how to compete and I have since told
myself I won’t fight for anyone ever again. Did that in the past and I lost
woefully, twice.





I saw this post on entitymag.com and
it made a whole lot of sense to me –





“Do not choose me, choose her. Because
if you really love me, I would not be one of the choices. Not A, not B, not C.
I would be the final answer.





I would not fight against it, I’d
gladly give you up.





If you feel you must choose, please do
not choose me”
– Krizzia Paolyn





I want to seclude myself so much, for
peace of mind. I want to be able to count the number of friends I have from the
top of my head. Loyalty and trust are so much of big deals for me. They are my
deal breakers when it comes to friendship and relationships.





Right now, I am very okay with the few
old friends I have known for years who have shown consistency and loyalty. No
one really needs the whole world around, sometimes just one person on your side
is an army.





I sent a
message about it. As hard as it was for me, I came clean and admitted I was
jealous. I sent Labrinth’s Jealous track to pass my message across (something I
do a lot, communicate via songs).





I got a response
but I was too messed up to open it, so I left it hanging for a day or so. When
my head was clear I opened the message, was not really much of a reply as such.
Nothing to reply to.





The silence
continued.





As the days
went by I began to get uneasy. Was this not the same person that apologised for
waiting for me to initiate chats which day here? At first I was pissed at my ex
for still being same old person who does that thing, where, if you are the last
person to send a message, you won’t message the other person till the person
chats you up. God! I was like some people just never grow. Then I realised I
was more pissed at myself for even bringing myself into the drama all over
again. I began to feel reaching out for closure was a big mistake.





Like common,
these are the same silly issues. I know I got my dose of issues, I am not the
most easy going person to be with but it can’t be said I didn’t learn and
adjust certain things about myself to make the relationship work, even when it
made me feel uncomfortable.





How’s it that same thing keeps happening over and over again without you learning from it? Babe probably got angry I didn’t open the message immediately. Something similar happened in December or so. I mean, this is not even the first time. It’s something I have explained; When I am in a bad place, I can’t bring myself to read messages because of what I am dealing with. You’d think same wisdom will be applied here, but nah, just have to stay stuck in your ways and expect everyone to react to things the way you will. This was another issue we had, our thought process and outlook on life were entirely different.





Later on it
dawned on me, like oh wait o, this silence actually means I wasn’t chosen.
Everything became clearer, I mean the sky became really blue and I could hear
the birds chirping clearly from afar. Truthfully, the long vulnerable message I
sent about not going to be able to stick around while they were friends, me admitting
my jealousy, was actually me low-key fighting for us getting back even when my
brain screamed every reason why we shouldn’t.





Mostly I
felt tricked. I put myself in that low position ‘cus after we met in Lagos, I
made a statement about working towards a good friendship but the response I got
was, I don’t want friendship, I want things to get back to how it was. That was
what got me. I can’t explain it, some force just always led me back. I’d have a
talk with myself, make a decision to stick with moving on from all the
drama…but one hi and I’m running back. “Why do fools fall in love?”





Unfortunately,
with some people you never ever get the true picture or full truth. Odd,
especially coming from someone who talks so much about effective communication.
If anything, babe’s the queen of bottling up. Stuff would happen and I would
ask how do you feel? The reply was always nah, its fine, I’m okay. Meanwhile
babe is bottling stuff up, which would be held as a grudge and used against me
much later. *sigh





In a weird
way, I felt relieved by the silence. I mean, barely two weeks had we reconciled
and the drama was back. It was then I realized it was the feeling of being in a
relationship I missed, not the person in particular.





But still I couldn’t shake off the feeling of being left out in the cold after my vulnerability. I ignored my rational thoughts, I chose to give us another chance. But nah, the other party wanted everything on a platter, not ready to give anything up…tsk tsk. Then I remembered a line in the Labrinth’s song I sent – ‘but I always thought you’ll come back, tell me, all you found was heartbreak and misery…’





I laughed
when I remembered this line because I knew this was the final blow. Like please,
don’t ever make the mistake of coming back. You can’t have it all, or think you
will leave for now, go have all the fun believing that as usual, I will be here
waiting with open arms to take you back.





It was bad
enough you flirted with my friends, lied to my face and acted out when you were
confronted, making me doubt/question myself and suspicions, thinking I was the
one with the problem. But you wish we could get back to how we used to be while
you are still being friends with the same people you disrespected me with?
Seriously?





Shows how
low you must think of me.





In life you really can’t have it all, don’t be a spoilt child. Some things just have to give. You have to let go and choose what’s important to you (else you go about chasing stones while leaving diamonds behind).





This was
beyond choosing me. This was just another reminder of how we both saw life from
different angles. Why did I bothered to stay long in the relationship in the
first place? I wish I never made the resolve to do the long haul. I felt bound
to it, and I honestly didn’t want to fail. I was too focused on going the long
haul to realize I was letting myself tolerate way too much crap.





@Segalink
tweeted this recently – “A strong
relationship requires choosing to love each other even in those moments when
you struggle to like each other”.





On the surface it looks like a good advice but if you ponder on it a bit longer, you realize this is what makes people endure so much disrespect and toxicity. Many times I chose to ignore the fact I wasn't really feeling my partner’s personality that much. I felt this was someone I love dearly and I had made a commitment to stay the long haul but deep down we were far from compatible.





I know I
have a soft heart and I forgive easily but there’s only so much I can take
before I close my heart.  I have arrived
at that point.





The new
single by Chris Brown featuring Justin Bieber sums it all –





“Won’t let the ghosts of our past weight my future down





I’m liberated





Energy is like a circle, it comes back around





Reciprocated





***





Don’t go reaching out





‘cause you can’t have everything





No matter how hard you try





Don’t check on me if we are not together





And it’s probably for a reason





But my pride
was hurt. I had walked away ending December, telling myself 2019 was a fresh
start for me and I was not going to take any of the madness into it. My life
had been pretty decent till I reached out for closure early this month. Now I
had gone back to my vomit and got myself immersed in silly drama.





My emotions
got all worked up. I was now furious at myself. Each day I repressed what I was
feeling. Normally I’d ignore any thought of whatever is eating me up, running
from dealing. I’d carry on, filled with bile and rage till the feeling fades
away but deep down I know there is an unresolved issue.





So waking up to the X Ambassadors’
song that morning, I told myself for once I was not going to run. I was going
to deal, I’d own my pain and go through it.





“Let it hurt, let it bleed





Let it take you right down to your knees





Let it burn to the worst degree





May not be what you want, but it’s what you need





Sometimes the only way around it





Is to let love do its work and let it hurt” – Let it hurt (Rascal Flatts)





At night, I lay down on my bed, eyes
closed, opened my mind and let it work through everything. I processed it all,
like I have never done before. I dug so deep, I let my head deal with every
emotion, thoughts and feelings. It was very uncomfortable but I had to swallow
the bitter pill.





My mind went through crap I had been
trying to ignore. I had to get up several times to breathe, then went back right
at it, digging and dealing with all the pieces of anger and hurt till well,
sleep took over. I slept terribly that night, but I woke up a better man.





I got clarity and realised four things
which were true and a fifth which I must work on -





  1. It was good I reached out and found closure.
  2. I tried to force a friendship, mistaking my missing the feeling of being in a relationship with thinking I was missing my ex.
  3. I realised, with this specific ex, I do not have to remain friends for many reasons which are glaring.
  4. I don’t have any feelings for my ex; love or resentment. I am numb and done with. Everything that happened needed to happen to get me here.
  5. All these arose from idleness.




  • I remember late March/early April when I was studying for a professional exam (I finally aced it – Distinction! after failing it twice) I didn’t have time to be thinking of exes or finding a new boo. I was focused, engaged and had purpose. Saturdays were spent at the office reading and I always felt excited when I gained new knowledge. I recently tweeted I miss preparing for exams and I got reactions from peeps along the line of what’s wrong with this one? Well, this has always been who I am. I loved night reading classes back then in the University. Examination periods always made me feel alive and energetic. It took me a while after graduating to get used to not preparing for exams.
  • Like I stated in this post,  2019 is about me putting myself through uncomfortable experiences. This year is about me taking exams I have been avoiding. I have been craving new knowledge for a while now. This is not a fluke, like I finally admitted to Afona the other day. Each year end when the pressure is on, when I feel like promotion is dicey, that’s when I look for an escape. I start my drama of going abroad for masters. Truth is, this has been like a distraction; me looking for a plan B (going for masters) in case plan A (my job) goes wrong. I am over that now.
  • Since I love my job, weird I know… I have decided to do my MSc in Benin City. I feel ready and low key excited about it. Though I have always thought my second degree will be from a foreign institution, I have to make do. Yea, I know I could do the online masters thingy, but it won’t work for me. I love the class room experience dearly. I need to go through it, feel the school and environment. I need everything real, not virtual.




It’s time to develop myself and focus
on me. I have never really been a relationship person, the one time I decided
to actually go the long haul, I got reminded for real why it is such a risk
loving someone, trusting someone to reciprocate your level of commitment.





Maybe I have not met the right person.
Maybe I may meet that person who will rock my world and change every opinion I
have about relationships, about marriage even, make a believer out of me, who
knows?





I saw this quote recently. The moment
I saw it, I knew that was where I was as regards my ex.





Realizing people aren’t meant for you and not resenting them

Growth.”

- @Bohemian.quotes




P/S - It took
me a week to write this post. A week filled with different emotions. At first it
felt like therapy. As the words flowed, I felt lighter, all I had been sorting
out in my head flowing out of me with all its weight. Mid-week I was filled
with rage as I went over the words already written. A day later I was
contemplating deleting everything. I abandoned it for two days and came back to
it this weekend. I’m in this state of mind where it’s like a chapter in my life
has been closed and I’m headed to a fresh start.





I feel free and can relate to every
words Muna tweeted –





“I
believe everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let
them go. Things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they are right. You
believe lies so eventually you learn to trust no one but yourself. And
sometimes, good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”  - @munchyberry